Friday 10 January 2020

Moby Beetle and Qassem Soleimani



There are a lot of things that have been going on in the recent imbroglio created by the Orange Orangutan in Iran.
First, let’s get this out of the way: the obvious interpretation of the Amerikastani murder of General Qassem Soleimani and Abu Muhandis of the Iraqi Popular Mobilisation Units (PMU) is that Amerikastan wants ISIS to return to Iraq. It was the team of Soleimani and Abu Muhandis who defeated ISIS in Iraq, and the only people in Iraq the murder will benefit is ISIS. As to why Ameikastan would want ISIS back in Iraq, the answer is equally simple: without ISIS the Imperialist States of Amerikastan has no excuse to maintain its occupation of Iraq. That is why ISIS was, after all, encouraged to capture Mosul and Fallujah and Tikrit in the first place.
Then, I have no problem whatsoever believing that many Amerikastani war criminals were eliminated or injured in the retaliatory Iranian missile strike on Amerikastani occupation force bases in Iraq.
Zionistani reporter Jacques Khoury of Ha’aretz tweeted that 224 injured Amerikastani war criminals were airlifted to Tel Aviv for treatment and then his account was mysteriously suspended with Khoury claiming, implausibly, that it was hacked. It’s extremely likely that Amerikastani casualties *would* be evacuated to zionistan for treatment because of they were taken home or to one of the NATO slaves, word would leak out at once. I predict that in the next weeks a remarkable number of Amerikastani troops will mysteriously “die in accidents” – a number corresponding exactly to the number killed in the Iranian missile barrage. Just a coincidence, of course!
However, whether or not any Amerikastani war criminal was eliminated, this is what we in the rest of the world have noticed: even though Amerikastan was warned in advance of the attack via the Swiss Embassy in Tehran, not one of the Iranian Qiam missiles was intercepted. This is, believe me, extremely significant. Why?
There are two models of Iranian Qiam missiles, the more than a decade old Qiam 1 and the (only relatively) more advanced Qiam 2. If they were Qiam 2 missiles they had terminal guidance, if they were Qiam 1 they didn’t. Qiam 1 are basically upgraded North Korean SCUD C missiles designed in the 1970s and have a circular error probability of 500 metres, very much not good for precise strikes, so it’s likely that they were Qiam 2. Why? Because the after strike images of the Amerikastani occupation base shows extremely precise hits on hangars and other facilities, that’s why. Either the Iranians were incredibly lucky, over and over, with a missile capable of only hitting within half a kilometre of the intended target....or they used missiles with terminal guidance.


But whatever model they are, they are still just upgraded SCUD C missiles from the 1970s…..and Amerikastani Patriot missiles and other defences proved totally unable to intercept them. This is not a message that went unnoticed. It did not go unnoticed by Turkey, which suddenly announced that the Russian S400 which it bought rather than the Amerikastani Patriot performed “far better than expected” in tests. It certainly did not go unnoticed by the zionist entity, which immediately began backing away from war talk, realising that if Amerikastan can’t even protect itself, it can’t protect the zionazi regime either. Fighting Iran is harder than bombing unarmed civilians in Gaza or shooting children in the West Bank. And it did not go unnoticed by the Orange Orangutan’s regime, which began dialling back tensions as fast as it could.
Yes, I believe that zionazi “prime minister” Nazinyahu was involved in Soleimani’s murder, probably the motive force in it. It, Nazinyahu I mean (no zionazi is human or even better than a virus as far as I am concerned) had expected an Amerikastani war against Iran, which it would have used to stay in power and thus out of –prison. Having found, however, that it has only made Iran stronger, it is now distancing itself from Trump’s Titanic disaster as fast as it can.
Why, before I go on further, do I consider all Amerikastanis who join their armed forces to be war criminals? Because, like gang members who volunteer for Mexican cocaine cartels or the Mafia, and immediately become criminals from the moment they join, whether or not they have yet committed a crime, any Amerikastani joining its armed forces is immediately a war criminal. No exceptions whatsoever. No sympathy either if and when they get blown to pieces.
As things stand today, though, I have absolutely no reliance on Amerikastanis being able to rein in their regime’s warmongering instincts, even if they really want to. And I have absolutely no reliance on their desire to want to. Back in the period 2003-2008, I was still naive enough to imagine that, like Indians or Pakistanis, most Amerikastanis were basically peace lovers who had nothing to do with their nation’s foreign policy. But then, as soon as the mass murdering mulatto monster Barack Hussein Obama took power, I saw those same Amerikastanis overnight turn from being anti war to enthusiastically cheering for more war. By 2016 the same Amerikastanis (the very same ones) who had literally been calling for George W Bush to be skinned alive ten years ago were cheering him as a hero because he had said some nice sounding words against Trump.
I decided, and have seen no reason to alter that decision since, that
1.     The only way Amerikastanis can be compelled to genuinely oppose their regime’s war crimes is if they are personally threatened. This is why Amerikastani regimes will do literally anything to avoid reintroducing conscription, including hiring mercenaries to do its fighting for it. The basic lesson of the Vietnam War was that the protestors were mostly motivated by the fact that they, or their spawn or boyfriends or brothers, were at risk of being exterminated by the Viet Cong. Amerikastani wars since then have been careful not to repeat that mistake.
2.     All Amerikastanis are legitimate targets, no matter whether male, female, “transgender”, or whatever, no matter whether aged 100 seconds or 100 years. There is no such thing as an innocent Amerikastani in a world where Amerikstani drone jockeys refer to the Afghan and Arab children they murder as “bugsplat” and “fun sized terrorists”. Only if and when each individual Amerikastani “civilian”, and its relatives, are at real and lethal risk can there be expected to be a change in their behaviour.
So, today’s cartoons. It’s fairly obvious what the first one is. I assume that anyone reading this has read Moby Dick, one of the greatest novels ever written, or at least is familiar with its story. It’s more than obvious that Trump is suddenly confronted with the fact that Iran is a far tougher nut to crack than expected. If that realisation means Trump can’t start a war to secure re-election in 2020, too bloody bad. Remember what happened to Ahab? Moby Dick didn’t ask to be harried and hunted. It wasn’t his fault he was forced to defend himself and eliminate the two-legged enemies who wouldn’t just leave him alone. Iran, a nation which has not invaded anyone since 1770, is in the same place, and will respond in exactly the same way.
Click to enlarge, if you want.

The second cartoon depicts Sarge and Beetle from the comic strip Beetle Bailey.

I dislike the strip intensely, and have long wanted to mock it. Also, it gives me an excuse to post the cartoon on the Comics Curmudgeon website – look at the bar on the left – where the strip is mocked by almost everyone.
As before, click to biggerofy

Unless Trump does something stupid, we will return to Jihadi Colin and his attempt to resist promotion to Caliph next episode.
Stay tuned.




Sunday 5 January 2020

Oh Sod Off Amerikastani



Lyrics:

Oh sod off Amerika-stani
In the hole you're so hammy
In your mind you're a hero
In the world you're a fanny.

Oh sod off Amerika-stani
In the hole you're so hammy
In your mind you're a hero
In the world you're a fanny
Uncool and staring at doom
Though you think you're so canny.
Uncool and staring at doom
Though you think you're so canny.

Flatfoot fool and only garish
Biggest bully in the entire parish
War drum tuba and scuba and your myths are all you cherish.
Anyhow you steal the plunder
Claiming your victims are terrorist jihadis
You can't hide blood shed in the bedroom
Like you couldn't in the Vietnam paddies.

You know you're a shady briber
And the source of all the baddies
In the hole you'll crouch shaking
From the rage of lasses laddies.

Oh sod off Amerika-stani
In the hole you're so hammy
In your mind you're a hero
In the world you're a fanny.
Oh sod off Amerika-stani
In the hole you're so hammy
In your mind you're a hero
In the world you're a fanny.

You thought you'd beat the Iraqi
The Afghan who crushed the British khaki
You thought you'd beat the Iraqi
The Afghan who crushed the British khaki
But things didn't go, didn't go your way
And left you broken, lost and whiny
And left you broken, lost and whiny.
The way was supposed to be easy clear
You'd make the world tremble in shock and fear
And the countries would go down tumbling
While you sat, sat drinking beer.

Oh sod off Amerika-stani
In the hole you're so hammy
Oh sod off Amerika-stani
In the hole you're so hammy
Hey nanny, hey nanny nanny
Hey nanny, hey nanny nanny.
Hey nanny, hey nanny nanny
Hey nanny, hey nanny nanny.

Ultra-dumb and bloody bungler
Hero? Hah! Just a robbing killer
In your hole you'll stumble cowering
When the world rises up in anger.

Yes, you're a cowardly cuckoo
Soon in the mincer you'll be too
Whipped and humbled by the people
You thought would be boiling in a bloody stew.
Once far but creeping ever near
Doomsday whispers in your trembling ear
Scream and fight or hide and stay mum
In just a heartbeat it'll be here.
Oh sod off you zionist too
With your white flag and your star blue
For too long you've had it your way
Now it's time to get lost and go screw.

Oh sod off Amerika-stani
In the hole you're so hammy
In your mind you're a hero
In the world you're a fanny.
Oh sod off Amerika-stani
In the hole you're so hammy
In your mind you're a hero
In the world you're a fanny.

(Lyrics and "singing" by yours truly)