Saturday, 26 December 2015

Twelve Terrors of Christmas

On the first day of Christmas ISIS sent to me
An issue of Dabiq full of fantasy.

On the second day of Christmas ISIS sent to me
Two orange jumpsuits
And an issue of Dabiq full of fantasy.

On the third day of Christmas ISIS sent to me
Three beheading videos
Two orange jumpsuits
And an issue of Dabiq full of fantasy.

On the fourth day of Christmas ISIS sent to me
Four suicide car bombs
Three beheading videos
Two orange jumpsuits
And an issue of Dabiq full of fantasy.

On the fifth day of Christmas ISIS sent to me
Five Facebook memes
Four suicide car bombs
Three beheading videos
Two orange jumpsuits
And an issue of Dabiq full of fantasy.

On the sixth day of Christmas ISIS sent to me
Six stolen museum statues
Five Facebook memes
Four suicide car bombs
Three beheading videos
Two orange jumpsuits
And an issue of Dabiq full of fantasy.

On the seventh day of Christmas ISIS sent to me
Seven tankers smuggling oil
Six stolen museum statues
Five Facebook memes
Four suicide car bombs
Three beheading videos
Two orange jumpsuits
And an issue of Dabiq full of fantasy.

On the eighth day of Christmas ISIS sent to me
Eight Russian airstrikes
Seven tankers smuggling oil
Six stolen museum statues
Five Facebook memes
Four suicide car bombs
Three beheading videos
Two orange jumpsuits
And an issue of Dabiq full of fantasy.

On the ninth day of Christmas ISIS sent to me
Nine Saudi arms shipments
Eight Russian airstrikes
Seven tankers smuggling oil
Six stolen museum statues
Five Facebook memes
Four suicide car bombs
Three beheading videos
Two orange jumpsuits
And an issue of Dabiq full of fantasy.

On the tenth day of Christmas ISIS sent to me
Ten moderate rebels joining
Nine Saudi arms shipments
Eight Russian airstrikes
Seven tankers smuggling oil
Six stolen museum statues
Five Facebook memes
Four suicide car bombs
Three beheading videos
Two orange jumpsuits
And an issue of Dabiq full of fantasy.

On the eleventh day of Christmas ISIS sent to me
Eleven channels warmongering
Ten moderate rebels joining
Nine Saudi arms shipments
Eight Russian airstrikes
Seven tankers smuggling oil
Six stolen museum statues
Five Facebook memes
Four suicide car bombs
Three beheading videos
Two orange jumpsuits
And an issue of Dabiq full of fantasy.

On the twelfth day of Christmas ISIS sent to me
Twelve NATO leaders lying
Eleven channels warmongering
Ten moderate rebels joining
Nine Saudi arms shipments
Eight Russian airstrikes
Seven tankers smuggling oil
Six stolen museum statues
Five Facebook memes
Four suicide car bombs
Three beheading videos
Two orange jumpsuits
And an issue of Dabiq full of fantasy.




Copyright B Purkayastha 2015



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5 comments:

  1. Anonymous26/12/2015, 19:19

    You keep telling people to actually read Dabiq. The accumulation is well over 700 pages, but I found a 2 page précis: http://www.cracked.com/blog/isis-wants-us-to-invade-7-facts-revealed-by-their-magazine/

    Main theme of the précis: Western leaders don't have a clue, a theme that's been reiterated (for good reason) ever since the Korean War.

    MichaelWme

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Bill the Butcher26/12/2015, 19:51

      Oh yes, I know that article well. It actually barely scratches the surface!

      Delete
  2. Chuck Baudelaire26/12/2015, 21:21

    You're so festive.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Jono26/12/2015, 22:02

    Nothing like a holy war to inspire great music and lyrics.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Anonymous29/12/2015, 01:16

    I spent this afternoon talking to a Syrian about the Arab Spring. And what she told me fits what I know to be true. It is called the Arab Spring because the US and Saudi Arabia decided to spring all their most violent prisoners on the condition that they promised to go directly to Syria without passing Go (but collecting 200 worth of heavy weaponry) and replacing the evil secular regime with a legitimate Salafist government.

    The prisoners' alternative, at least in Saudi Arabia, was life in gaol, and that would be a very short sentence. But if they accepted they would either gain great honour or many houri.

    It's not clear what the US offered their prisoners in their Iraqi prisons, but probably something very similar.

    And we know that the Daesh leadership formed in Iraqi prisons run by the US and were then released, so much of the Syrian's account of the Arab Spring is easily verified as true.

    MichaelWme

    ReplyDelete

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